Lonely
by Maddiebug
Summary: Adrien Agreste wakes up in a hospital bed, but he doesn't remember who he his. He doesn't know where he is. He doesn't know why he is. Until a pretty blue haired girl shows up, claiming to be his friend. kinda adrienette. Oneshot. Rated T because I think I swear like twice.


**Update: this is a one shot**

 **, let's go!this is from Adrien's perspective, let me know what you think. Thanks for reading.**

 **...**

I was alone.

Blinking, I looked around a familiar room, but nothing made sense. I knew where I was… the white walls and bright, blinding lights weren't new to me, stinging my eyes and making me squint. The room was like a scene from a movie, clean and perfect to the point of being ominously eerie. I felt like I was constantly being watched. I could hear the distant hum of machinery and the constant beeping of a heart monitor. The stiff bed made my neck ache and for a moment I thought I'd never sleep again. The window, overlooking a noisy highway system filled with traffic, wasn't much of a surprise either.

Even the vanilla scented air freshener, making me a little nauseous, and the empty feeling in my stomach were something I knew, I just didn't understand. How did I get there? How long had I been there? Why did my head hurt so much? What happened? Why was everything so quiet? Where were my friends? Or my family?

As I continued to question my surroundings, I noticed a familiar blinking red light is on the table. A phone. _A dead phone._ I was hoping it would have some answers or an explanation. I tried to pick the phone up, but my arm was like drying concrete, barely moveable and unnaturally heavy. Even just barely moving it hurt, seemed like something was broken. I was broken. I felt stuck.

More than anything, I felt alone. I gave up and closed my eyes.

#

Maybe I fell asleep, or maybe I had a concussion, but I was highly annoyed and half asleep when I was awoken by a desperate voice;

"Kitty, you gotta wake up."

I knew the voice. It was as familiar as the voice in my own head, I just couldn't place it. I opened my eyes, and squinting through the fluorescent hospital light, I saw a friendly face with blue hair, and blue eyes that sparkled like the stars. Her pigtails parted evenly across her face, in a cute way. I couldn't stop looking at her face, the tiny freckles everywhere, the way her sky blue eyes perfectly matched her hair, her little button nose. She was kinda short, and her hands were shaky, but she seemed at ease around me. I think she knew me, before I ended up here. I think I smiled, or at least tried to. My face hurt. I definitely looked at the other person. We made awkward eye contact that I've tried to erase from my memories, but I can't. We were staring at each other for a solid minute, unblinking, saying nothing. It was awkward.

I didn't know who she was. I didn't even know who I was, but I knew one thing: she had the answers I needed...

She spoke softly, as if she were afraid, almost in a whisper, "Adrien"

"Adrien."

That was my name. I had forgotten it, which seemed strange. Who forgets a name, especially their own name? Something bad must've happened, I decided, an accident of some sort. _Adrien_ got hurt and hit his head, or something. _Adrien_ couldn't remember what happened, and I was Adrien.

Her quiet, concerned voice continued, "-you've been in a coma for three days.

That was all that I knew. _Adrien_ had probably been in accident. _Adrien_ had just woken up from a coma. _Adrien_ couldn't move his arm. _Adrien_ had a headache and some regrets.

" _What regrets do I have?_ "

The voice in my head didn't respond. I felt alone, even though I knew the blue haired boy was there. I just didnt know why

Honestly, I felt bad for _Adrien._ First of all, it's a terrible name. If I could've chosen a name it would've been something cool, like 'Charlemagne,' or 'Chat Noir' but no, I had to get stuck with the most boring name on the planet. _Adrien. Ugh._ Second of all, 'Adrien' had some terrible accident. Accidents are never fun, and whatever happened was bad enough that 'Adrien' was hospitalized. I wanted to stop being 'Adrien'. I wasn't _Adrien,_ not really.  
 _Adrien_ would've known who the boy in front of me was. I had no idea. _Adrien_ would've known his own last name, or what year it was. _Adrien_ would know where he was. All I could remember about myself was that I could play the ukulele, was fairly skilled at juggling, couldn't snap, and I was failing Geometry.

I heard a voice, "how do you know this?"  
I paused for a moment, but had no logical response. _Great_ I was hearing voices. That's definitely a sign of a sane person.

"Totally," the voice responded, making me question how crazy I actually was. That's when I remembered that everyone has a voice in their heads. That's how people think. I probably _was_ going crazy though

 _Adrien_ might've known what had happened, but my memories were as empty as the room I was in. _Adrien_ probably would've been glad to see this dude, the blue haired girl who I almost forgot about while internally monologuing, but I felt nothing. The worst part was, I was Adrien.

Adrien wasn't alone.

#

My throat felt dry and raspy like a desert. I coughed, loudly, making me wince. It hurt my lungs. All I felt was pain when I tried to speak. "What happened?" It was barely a squeak, but she seemed to understand.

She didn't respond for a moment, and I started to panic. My heart pounded like a hammer against my head. The machines started to beep and everything went fuzzy. I tried to breathe, tried to stay awake, tried to forget the last words I heard before everything faded.

"There was an accident. Kitty, you saved me, but you couldn't save yourself." Her face, smiling down at me with sad blue eyes, was the last thing I saw before everything went black.

I descended into darkness, alone.

#

The next time I woke up she wasn't there. No one was. I was all alone, but this time, my arms weren't strapped down. I could lift my head to look around, and it was bad. Both of my arms and my left leg were in casts. I grabbed the phone next to me. Apparently someone had plugged it into the charger since the last time I woke up.

The lock screen was a cool photo of the blue haired girl at sunset. On her face was a mask, spotted red and black, but it was her. And she was gorgeous. I attempted to access the phone, but it had a password. I tried, but couldn't guess it, and, feeling bored and lonely, once again, I fell asleep.

I began to feel a little better. I was able to sit up on my own and speak without coughing. If you asked me, I had improved greatly, but no one ever asked me. I never saw any nurses or doctors. None. I guess I just assumed they checked up on me when I was sleeping or something. Still, it seemed strange that I never saw them. They weren't the only people that never showed up. My own family never even showed up. I didn't remember them at all, but I assumed they existed, and it stung a bit that they didn't care enough to visit.

The blue haired girl, however, was a constant visitor. Almost every day she arrived, sharing new things about _Adrien,_ and I began to feel like I knew myself.

Sometimes, he brought photos when he visited.

"See him," she told me, pointing at a photo of an angry looking man, "that's your dad, and those people," he pointed at the teens standing next to her, "That's our other friends, Nino and Alya"

"Alya, Nino, Dad" my voice echoed."what about Mom?" When she shook her head, I knew. My mom was gone. I didn't remember the people in the photos, but I felt like I knew them in the same way I knew the blue-haired girl. "Why haven't they come to visit me?"

When I asked this, I immediately regretted it. Her face darkened like the sea before a storm. It mustve been a sensitive topic. She frowned, "It's complicated."

She changed the topic, and we never really spoke of my family again, but the photos stayed. When I was alone, I looked at the photos, hoping to actually see them, but my family and friends never came.

No one came

Except her

Other days, she brought stories. _Adrien_ and her had been best friends for twelve months. Together, they traveled around Paris and pretended to be superheroes. stopping small crime and just being good people. I still didn't feel like Adrien _,_ but I liked the stories. Some were funny. Some of the stories really seemed to define me as a person. Other stories just seemed too weird to be told me about everything from playing games in kindergarten to the time I managed to set my hair on fire while making pasta. Apparently, I'm fairly clumsy and somewhat a disaster.

The stories we're nice, but I felt alone in my confusion.

#

The blue-haired girl could always make me laugh. Her sense of humor consisted mainly of really bad cat puns, but for whatever reason, I couldn't stop laughing at them. "Hey kitty, why do cats never laugh?" she said, struggling not to laugh at his own joke.

"I don't know, why?" She had started calling me kitty and Chaton, saying that we had nicknames for each other.

"Because they have a clawful sense of humor." She started laughing uncontrollably. Honestly, the joke wasn't that good, but seeing her so happy, I couldn't help but laugh along.

"You have an awful sense of humor," I mumbled, but I laughed a little bit. From anyone else, I probably would've rolled my eyes and groaned, but she had mastered the delivery of her jokes so well that I had to laugh at them. And it seems crazy, but something about Cat puns just felt right.

It felt _purrfect_

She always get this faraway look in her eyes when she'd talk about the past. His smile lit up the room, "We were best friends, you and me, worked together through everything, kindergarten to high school." She laughed, "Every time we had to do a crappy group project, we'd pair up. The perfect team."

"Really? You seem like you can do anything," I blurted out.

"Me? Nah." she chuckled, "I can write papers and shit, but I can't stand up and present in front of a class to save my life. You always had so much confidence and strength." It seemed a little ironic, given my current situation, and lack of strength or knowledge, about myself or anything, but I chose not to mention it.

With her I never really felt alone.

#

One day the blue haired girl brought me a ukulele. She played a couple songs, not well, barely recognizable, but she tried. The ukulele was probably out of tune. She didn't have much talent, but she made up for it in effort. When she played, she couldn't stop smiling, Somehow, I could remember the words to songs, even if I didn't know my own birthday.

"It's June 4, 2001, exactly a week younger than me, you'd be 15 in a couple weeks," she said without even looking up.

"I didn't realize I said that out loud."

"You say a lot of things Chaton, even if you don't remember them." she sighed and kept playing the ukulele.

Eventually, she handed the ukulele to me. "You probably don't remember this either, but it used to be a big part of who you were."

I took it from his hands and hesitated. It felt strangely comfortable in my hands. I stared at it for a moment, twisted the knobs, and then, without even thinking, I played through the song _Somewhere over the Rainbow,_ badly singing along.

She harmonized and it was great. Her voice blended with mine and wow. It felt like something bigger than it was. It felt miraculous

"Wow," she laughed, "I didn't even know you could do that."

I shrugged. "Honestly, neither did I." I strummed a few more chords, and I finally felt like I belonged. "For once, I feel like myself, you know? This is the first thing that has made sense to me since the accident." She nodded, and I kept playing music.

When she left that night, the ukulele stayed behind, and even though I was the only person in the room, I didn't feel quite so alone.

#

When she finally showed back up in my room, I had quite a few questions. I had finally been able to understand my confusion and put it into words. I just hoped she would understand what I meant.

I had to ask her about everything. Why did she keep insisting that I was a hero when I couldn't even save myself? Why was she the only person that visited me? Where was my family? What was an Akuma? How long had I been in the hospital? What exactly happened to me? Who was Plagg?

I didn't realize that i had a lot of pent up anger and stress. I felt that she wanted me to be someone I couldn't ever be again. I didn't mean to start a fight and I never wanted him to leave. "Who are you?" I asked her

She only smirked, "You know who I am."

"I really don't. I didn't even know who I was until you told me." I sighed, "And I barely even know myself."

"I'm your friend, trust me on that." She winked, "and you're Chat Noir, famed Parisian superhero!" She said, dramatically waving her arms.

"I don't even know what that means. I'm just a boy. I do trust you, but why are you always here?"

"Because I care about you." She insisted

"You don't have to care. No one else does." I looked away, feeling sick, "No one ever did."

"What do you mean 'No one ever cared,'" she groaned, emphasizing the air quotes as he spoke, "I've always cared! For as long as I've known you Agreste, I've cared. I've more than cared"

I rolled my eyes. "Don't you have a life?" she started to say something, but I cut him off. "You're always here, all of the time. I appreciate that you care, but you're constantly invading my space, trying to get me to remember. Maybe I'm different now. I don't even feel like Adrien. I'm not your _Chat Noir_ , and I never will be."

"I'm just here to support you, to be your friend." she replied.

"If I didn't know better, I'd say I was your only friend. Or you're obsessed with me."

"Right now, I'm your _only_ friend." She rolled her eyes, "I was just trying to help and you just attack me. I thought you wanted to know who you used to be."

"Why don't you just leave me alone?"

"I can't do that to you. This is what the old you would've wanted." She insisted.

"Well, I'm not the old me anymore." I growled, sounding oddly like a cat., " The old me is dead. You just want me to be something I'm not. That's not even true friendship."

When I mentioned death, she glared at me, any sign of joy gone from her face. His cold tone sent shivers down my spine. "If you don't want me here, then just say so. I can leave at any time, _kitty,"_ her bitter tone scared me. It was unlike anything I'd ever see from her.

My vision flickered and I felt dizzy, "I don't want you to leave."

"No, you're right," She shook her head and continued in a shaky voice, "It's for the best. I should go. I have to move on so you can."

"Move on? From what? The accident that we don't speak about? I'm fine! I've been getting better, haven't you seen the progress? I can sit up again, I'm functioning well!" My voice sounded fake, even to me. "Haven't you noticed?" I asked, waving my arms around. "I got the casts off. Pretty soon I'll be able to walk again. Maybe then, things will be normal."

She shook his head, "Things can never be normal. You aren't even real."

 **#**

"I'm right here." I cried, reaching out to touch her hand, "I'm as real as you are."

Instead of holding my hand, she shivered, as if a ghost had passed through him. His eyes became glassy and distant, like a doll. "You were as real as I am, kitty."

"What are you trying to tell me? I don't understand."

"You're not real." She reached a hand up to wipe the tears from her eyes, but they kept coming. "You're dead. You're gone and it's all my fault."

"Maybe you should leave for a minute," I said gently.

"If I leave," she whimpered, cheeks red and blotchy, "I'll never see you again. They say you'll never wake up from the coma. It's my fault."

"Its not your fault."

"Yes it is," she said, and placed a hand on my head.

Without warning, all of my memories came back. Every story she told me made sense. I remembered my name, Adrien A Agreste, as boring as i had feared. I remembered her name, Marinette. I remembered being Chat Noir and fighting crime. I remembered Ladybug. As Mari stood in front of me, I understood. She was my lady. I remembered my family, or what was left of it. I remembered the confusion and loss after mom left. I remembered school. I remembered everything. Suddenly, I knew why I was in the hospital. It hit me like a bolt of lightning, or more accurately, an akuma driven truck. I remembered the accident.

#

After a moment, I took a breath. "The accident wasn't your fault. I was the one who wasn't paying attention while driving. I was the one that pushed you to safety."

"I failed you, Adrien." The tears dripped down her face.

"You didn't fail me. I failed myself. Stop blaming yourself and move on. Blame Hawkmoth, babe." I smiled weakly, "if you give me your miraculous, I get a wish."

"What?" She asked, unclipping her earrings and placing them in my hand, "do you really think this will work Chaton?"

"I know it will Buggaboo," I closed my eyes and wished. The old me would've wished for friends or her love, but I already had that. I knew how that felt. _I wish she could be happy without me_

After a moment, she spoke, "did it work?"

the Earrings reappeared on her ears, but my ring was gone. "It worked Buggaboo. I'm sorry, but I had to do it."

"What did you do? You wished to save yourself, right? Right?"

When I didn't respond, the tears streamed down her face. "You absolute idiot"

"Go Mari," I said, feeling at rest. "Paris needs it's Ladybug."

"Paris doesn't have Ladybug. It hasn't had her, not since the accident."

"Ladybug is needed."

"But Ladybug needs her Chat. I can't lose you, " Mari insisted, wiping tears from her face, "and that's what will happen if I'm not here."

I spoke softly, "You have to let me go at some point. Maybe it's for the best."

"Fine," she growled, changing moods as if by magic. "I never want to see your stupid face or hear you stupid voice again. You're the reason everyone thinks I'm crazy, because I am. Chat Noir died a long time ago and he took Ladybug with him. Ghosts don't exist, and even if they did, you'd never want to talk to me. Not after what I did, or failed to do. You're right. I should go."

"You can't just go," I said. "You know what you have to do."

"I love you Adrien."

"You know what you have to do," I repeated.

She shook her head. "I can't do that to you. I can't do it to me."

"Then ill do it to myself." I grabbed her yo-yo and wrapped it around myself. "No more evildoing for you little Akuma."

Softly, she whispered, "i love you. bye bye little butterfly"

I expected to dissolve into dust immediately, but that's not what happened.

A single tear dripped down her face and she kissed me. And then she turned and ran out the door before I could see the waterfall streaming from her eyes.

As she left, everything went dark. The lights went off and everything around me faded into nothingness. For the first time in what felt like forever, I felt alone again.

And I never stopped feeling alone

..

 **Leave a review or suggestion or whatever below**

 **Thanks for reading:**

 **Note, originally this was for a grade in English and they were both boys, one of whom unexplainably had blue hair. I wasn't sure if it should be Marin or Marinette, so I changed it so it fit the miraculous storyline, but if I mess up on gender, that's why. Also might be a little ooc sorry. Oof**

 **Also headcanon Adrien can play ukulele.**


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